Explain me private banks like I'm 5 please?

johanmichel said:

Everyone else just tries to make money off me.

Welcome to real life

JohnnyDoe said:

Welcome to real life

Haha yeah... By now I know I have to hide having money. Everyone constantly wants to "borrow" from me. I lost a lot of friends because of it.

johanmichel said:

Haha yeah... By now I know I have to hide having money. Everyone constantly wants to "borrow" from me. I lost a lot of friends because of it.

We hear you! It's sad!
C'est la vie, mon ami! 😎

PS. I'm going to do a thread on this and on an Italian economics professor at UC Berkeley*** who, in my opinion, best explained human nature.

*** It was the 1950s, so it was not a crazy liberal college (yet).

johanmichel said:

I always thought private banking will unlock very special services... turns out my private advisors try to scam me constantly.

The only big benefit for me are better term/time deposits, free wine free chocolate and the advisor coming to my house whenever he wants to sell me something...

In general I prefer to be my own advisor. Everyone else just tries to make money off me.

Well, I think @Sols described it here right Unlock the Gates of Success: Mentor Group Gold! . I would just amend that in a good private bank you can enjoy also (valuable) advisory with structuring your wealth, trusts etc. If you are able to manage all of this on your own, then in fact you do not need private banking.

johanmichel said:

Haha yeah... By now I know I have to hide having money. Everyone constantly wants to "borrow" from me. I lost a lot of friends because of it.

A sad, unfortunalely not rare, story. My sympathies are with you. (Perhaps you just know that these friends lost were not really friends...)

JohnnyDoe said:

Everything is negotiable in life, but that would not be a good start to a relationship.
Anyway I don't see the point of using this bank for less than $5m.

Let's say one liquidates $5m in crypto via MtPelerin and sends it to Cite Gestion. What would they provide? They are obviously part of CRS so if the UBO is a US person, no benefit. Is that accurate? They'll surely provide a credit card etc. but anything else that one should be excited about? Genuinely curious because I want to be tempted to do this.

klausschwab said:

Let's say one liquidates $5m in crypto via MtPelerin and sends it to Cite Gestion. What would they provide? They are obviously part of CRS so if the UBO is a US person, no benefit. Is that accurate? They'll surely provide a credit card etc. but anything else that one should be excited about? Genuinely curious because I want to be tempted to do this.

There is absolutely nothing to be tempted by at any bank, and it is a very bad idea to exchange $5m (Or any amount) of crypto into fiat.
If you really feel the need to do that for your own reasons, then this is a reasonable choice. Much like execution by hanging might seem reasonable when compared to torture.